Chopping Mall (1986) Review

Simply put, Chopping Mall is Red Dawn meets The Terminator – inside of the slasher genre. It’s a low-budget horror that of course spins into predictability and laziness, and yet, this 1986 slasher is surprisingly far from terrible. In fact, I had a good time to the max. Chopping Mall is unadulterated fun packed with cheese and a jarring sense of seriousness that makes for the better. It isn’t so much a full fledged slasher as it is a sci-fi, but it works to the benefit because it thinks it can be brilliantly be both. Which it isn’t.

Don’t be on the lookout for chopping, because there aren’t any. It’s just a neat pun. In actuality, it’s laser beams, choke-holding, and electrifying, and despite the lack of gore and blood that is usually accustomed in a slasher, it only intensifies the campy taste of it all. And if you haven’t guessed by now, the killers are robots. Simply created as nightly security guards at a shopping mall, these daleks are out to exterminate anyone with the least bit of character development. When a few horny teens host a secret party in the mall at night, they’re caught off guard by the killer robots, and with no way of getting out until the morning, they decide to fight back.

Funny enough, Chopping Mall takes itself too seriously at times – I think. Whether or not it was intended to be a tad serious, it undoubtedly makes it more laughable. The fact it tries to dramatize such a nonsensical plot is hilarious and ultimately redeems the film. The budget is quite obvious. The FX are weak and limited, apart from one head explosion that’s probably the film’s greatest moment. However, it’s arguably the most unusually fun slasher I’ve seen. Chopping Mall is nothing but a dumb fun time.

5.0/10

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